Seeking The Joy

When my husband was growing up, he went to summer camp and then became a leader at that camp.  One of the traditions at Camp Belknap is lighting the lamp of love.  One of the rays from this lamp of love is the instruction to be joyful - specifically, to seek the joy of being alive.

At our wedding, we lit the lamp of love (of course).  Later, one of our favorite wedding presents came from a former Belknap leader: two hammers, one for each of us, with handles that were engraved with the reminder to "Seek the Joy."  

It is not always easy to remember to seek the joy of being alive.  In fact, it is often much easier to feel as if joys and sorrows come to each of us regardless of whether or not we seek them.  But, as he often does, Baby recently reminded me that seeking the joy is a much better way to live.

Baby learned to wave a little while ago, and when he did it was his favorite activity for the next few days.  He would wave to us at dinner.  He would wave to us in the bath.  He would wave to himself while he rode in his stroller.  And, one night, on his way to sleep, eyes closed, fully relaxed, he waved to nothing in particular.  He was - very simply - seeking the joy.  

BREAKING NEWS... and Update

Fire and huge amounts of smoke pouring out of building near Waverly and Myrtle...

Waverly between Myrtle and Willoughby is already closed off with a fire truck and two police cars on one end (the Willoughby end).

Hoping that no one was hurt...

UPDATE:

From the Myrtle Ave blog, and The Local, it seems the fire was on the roof of a building near Myrtle and Waverly, and that there were no serious injuries.

RED JACKET ORCHARDS CSA - Carroll Gardens and East Village Pick-Up!

I just received the following tip about a CSA with pick-ups in Carroll Gardens and the East Village...

Interested in getting farm fresh fruit at an affordable price?  Would you like to support a local, family farm?  These are two great reasons to sign up for a CSA!  Through a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture), members pay a farm up front for share of produce that they can pick up from a distribution location once a week.  The price they pay for this share is cheaper than purchasing the same quality of produce at a grocery store or farmers' market.  At the same time, a CSA ensures a certain amount of revenue for the farm.  By joining a CSA, members can also familiarize themselves with their farmer: they can learn more about how their food is grown and who grows it.    

    

Though most vegetable CSAs are sold out in the city, you now have an opportunity to sign up for something completely new - a fruit CSA!  The Red Jacket Orchards Fruit CSA will provide members with weekly shares of farm-fresh fruit from August - November.  Fruit CSA shares in the city are currently additional product shares of vegetable CSAs - you must be a member of a vegetable CSA to partake in the fruit share; this is not the case for the Red Jacket Orchards Fruit CSA, who is completely independent of any vegetable CSA.  The Red Jacket Orchards Fruit CSA shares will have a variety of fruits grown on their orchards in upstate NY, such as peaches, plums, pears, apples, and grapes.  In addition to fruits, members will receive apple sauces, jams, and fruit juices.      

The Red Jacket Orchards CSA will have two distribution locations, which are listed below.  Full and half shares are available.  Full shares are priced at $22 per week and half shares are $13 per week.    Membership applications should be sent in by August 5th.  To see a sample share list and for more information on how to sign up, visit http://redjacketorchardscsa.wordpress.com/about/  or e-mail redjacketorchardscsa@gmail.com.

Distribution Locations:
1.  Brooklyn Farmacy and Soda Fountain
513 Henry Street, Brooklyn (Carroll Gardens)
Corner of Henry Street and Sackett Street
Tuesdays, August 10 – November 9 from 4:00pm – 6:45pm

2.  Jimmy’s No.43
43 E. 7th Street, Manhattan (East Village)
Corner of 7th Street and 2nd Ave
Saturdays, August 14 – November 13  from 12:30pm – 3:30pm

Sand in the Place Where You Are

On July 1, we picked up my husband's youngest brother on the corner of Flatbush and Myrtle at 8:05 a.m..  Nearly eight hours later, we arrived at Camp, my husband's family's cottage on a lake in Maine.  

My husband and his three brothers spent their summers at Camp as boys  (yes - he is one of four boys - this might be a good time to raise your glass to his parents and their tireless efforts at parenting).  During those summers, they spent most of their days catching frogs and snakes and getting into all sorts of secret mischief with the other kids around the lake.  Every Fifth of July, they would scour the lake for the remains of the fireworks from the night before.  They would compete to see who could find not only the most but also the best dead fireworks (apparently, multi-shot cakes were the "best" and Roman Candles were a close second).  The winner's prize was a simple but very real pleasure - pride.

It is probably fair to write that both my husband and I expected that Baby would love Camp and the beach and the lake and the general relief of being out of the city (at least temporarily).  Baby corrected us - yet again.

Random Family

A good friend recommended repeatedly (and over the course of several years) that I read Random Family, by Adrian Nicole LeBlanc, and I finally did this spring.  My husband, who read the book last fall, warned that I might not want to read Random Family during my commute because so much of the material can be heartbreaking.  I ignored my husband's advice and plowed straight ahead.  While I was waiting for the R train to take me home a few weeks ago, I finished reading it, and there I was, on the platform at Rector Street, finishing Random Family and starting to cry.

Apparently, my husband was right.  But the reason my eyes welled with tears that day was that LeBlanc had done something truly amazing at the end of her book -- she gave her readers the gift of a happy ending.  Random Family follows the lives of two women for eleven years through their multiple teenaged pregnancies, their varied relationships with men and with the criminal justice system, and - most importantly - their even more varied relationships with the members of their families.  After having chronicled an eleven-year series of substantial parent-to-child disappointments, in the end, LeBlanc gives us a brief scene of joy and love between a father and his daughter.

In the ordered and comfortable world of baby books, mommy blogs,  and parenting education, the starting point is always a celebration of the relationship between parent and child with the underlying assumption that each of us is the best parent for his or her baby.  But can that simple notion withstand complex circumstances?  Is a teenaged mom who goes out to clubs, bribing her own mother to watch her small children in exchange for cocaine, the best mom for her baby?  The answer is yes.  Heartbreakingly, yes.  There are many lessons from Random Family, but the one that has serious lasting power for me is that no matter who you are or what you do, your baby will still need your love and support more than anything in the world.  And so it will be my life's work to remember that fact and to honor it.

Attack of the Wiggle Monster

Baby is officially a Wiggle Monster.

Pros:

1. Baby is curious.
2. Baby has an adventurous spirit - ready to explore the world.
3. Baby is getting strong enough to get himself around, which means he really wants to get himself around (an amazing positive cycle that builds confidence and independence).

Cons:

1. Bath-time has morphed into: "Oh, [Baby] look at this awesome ____ [insert: frog, penguin, duck, puffer fish, turtle, star]!"  "Ummmm, [Baby], try to enjoy the bath while you are sitting down . . ."  "[Baby], please do not try to climb ____ [insert: out of the bath, up the wall of the tub, onto the soap dish]."
2. Diaper changes are starting to resemble putting a diaper on a rotisserie chicken -- if said chicken had wiggly arms and legs and let out great sounds of frustration and irritation with said attempt to put said diaper on said chicken.
3. Changing Baby's clothes is a process that sometimes involves two people, or, at the very least, it involves several moments of pause while Baby flips over, gets on his hands and knees, and rocks back and forth in what appears to be an attempt to launch himself off of the changing table and out into the World, where he is obviously meant to be, clothes or no clothes, Momma.  

Tonight, after the bath (See, Con #1), I brought Baby to his room to get him ready for bed (See, Cons #2-#3), and an epic wiggle battle ensued.  Baby rotated on his own axis at least three times while I tried to fasten his first diaper.  Yes, first diaper.  One of the tabs on the first diaper broke free from the rest of the diaper, which resulted in more rotating, more wiggling, and - oh, yes - a prolonged diaper experience.  

By the time Baby and I were working on his PJs, I found my mind wandering.  I flashed to my adventures in Kruger where I tracked lions on foot, stood several yards from a rhino, and walked through a herd of water buffalo.  [To be clear, water buffalo are no joke.]  If I could handle those wild animals, surely I can handle a Wiggle Monster.

But here's my question:  If, during a mere diaper and clothing change, I summon the inner-strength it took to face lions, rhinos, and water buffalo, what when Baby becomes Toddler and delivers his first (and second, and third) . . . temper tantrum?   

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the dads  -- may the giggles and shouts of laughter be extra loud today!