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my chi moving

Leaving no stone unturned in my quest to get a handle on the migraine problem, I have seen an acupuncturist and a neurologist in the last month.

The acupuncturist listened carefully to my history of migraines and gave me some ideas for prevention.  She asked me if anything else was going on aside from the migraines.  I told her I have a two-year-old and a newborn.  She nodded a knowing nod, and I did not need to say any more.

Then she put the needles in.  After she finished with the needles, but before she left me for a twenty-five minute rest on the table, the acupuncturist said:

If you feel any tingling, itching, or even aching, that's just your chi moving.

Twenty-five minutes later, I was done and on my way out.

About five days later, I went further uptown to a neurologist.

When she was taking my medical history and asked about any depression, I hemmed and hawed something about post-baby-blues-but-not-really-post-partum-depression.  Her expression in response was some kind of hybrid between confused and impatient.  Not exactly inviting.  So I did not go on.  I did not tell her about singing Bug the lullaby he always used to ask for and starting to cry because I  no longer put him to bed or sing him lullabies, and I did not tell her how that left me feeling that I was not doing very well at shepherding all of us into becoming a family of four.  I did not tell her about how, when Squish was only seven weeks old, he got his first cold and was up with a coughing fit at four in the morning that left me in tears and almost shouting at my husband to call the doctor.  I did not tell her how I felt like I was failing to be that calm mom of a second baby who has peaceful perspective about everything.  I did not tell her about the vertigo of feeling both that the world is unraveling a little and that I am completely incapable of remembering the world before this perfect little squish arrived.

Twenty-five minutes later, she gave me a prescription for a nasal spray (with the instruction that I should take it like cocaine - I kid you not), and I left.

The drug she prescribed has helped twice now - though apparently nothing will prevent or stop the aura.  (When I told the neurologist that the aura were the most disturbing part of my migraine experience, she could not understand why.  She even circled back to the topic later in the appointment, eventually suggesting that I treat the aura like a light show - I kid you not.)

The acupuncture has already helped reduce the frequency of the migraines.

So this year, my New Year's Resolution is to keep that chi moving.

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